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This is Why I Hate Banks
Published by MoonDog on March 23, 2009
I can’t tell you how much I hate banks. I’ve hated banks since I opened my first account at the age of 15. At that time, old ladies with blue hair stood behind the counter looking at you as if they were doing you a favor.
Wait, tellers still do that, but it isn’t relegated to old ladies.
As far as I’m concerned, there isn’t a bank on this planet that deserves my business and here’s a perfect example why they don’t.
I have a friend that was let go at my soon to be former bank. The only reason I was doing business with them was because of my friend and I’m in the process of locating another bank.
Earlier today I was having a conversation with and old lady – she had white hair, not blue by the way – about the possibility of opening an account.
After we discuss some of the particulars, I presented her with a stack of checks I’ve received from those I do business with.
The old lady, whom we’ll call Ernestine, because old ladies have names like Ernestine and Hyacinth, proceeds to tell me the bank will “allow” me to open the account, but the checks will have to be placed on hold for 15 days.
“15 days?,” I ask.
“Those out of state checks take longer to clear than checks written in state,” says Ernestine.
“Lady, are you seriously suggesting that it would take this bank 15 days to clear a check I know damn good and well you could clear later tonight?”
Ernestine says, “that’s our policy, I’m sorry.”
“Yes, you are,” I replied. “Not only are you insulting my intelligence, but for you (the bank) to hold a deposit for 15 days to save you the meager interest your paying is nothing more than petty theft.”
Ernestine apparently senses I’m on a roll and doesn’t bother with an attempt to respond.
“Let me tell you something, this is why people, especially me, hate banks. You want my business, yet you’re not willing to make the funds available in a reasonable amount of time.
Had you told me a hold would be required for 48 hours, I would have opened an account.”
Ernestine says, “You’re not going to open the account?”
I hate banks.
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