Hustler.com released Danielle Staub Raw on June 9, hyping it with the same vigor as every celebrity sex tape to hit the market. And just like most amateur sex tapes, Danielle Staub Raw amounts to a huge waste of time.
Staub, a divorced, single mother of two daughters, is best known for being featured in the Bravo network reality TV series Real Housewives of New Jersey.
Staub is alleged to have had a checkered past when stories surfaced of her reported use of drugs, frequent sex partners and run-ins with the law.
Hustler predictably suggested Danielle Staub Raw would show you a side of her that you’ve never seen before.
While some moments throughout the 75 minute tape do expose Staub like we’ve never seen her, it isn’t necessarily a side of her you’d want to see. 
The first 10 minutes of the tape show Staub in the kitchen preparing breakfast for her unidentified boyfriend.
While we never see his face, there are suggestions he’s an athlete, with Staub asking him if he could sneak her into the locker room so they could have sex.
Later in the tape while they’re doing the deed, Staub says he scored a touchdown, suggesting he’s a football player.
Unfortunately for viewers, one of the physical features we didn’t want to be exposed to is the worst boob job in history.
In fact, the physician who performed Staub’s breast augmentation should have their license to practice medicine revoked.
Both of Staub’s breasts are lopsided and scars from the procedure are clearly visible, a less than aesthetically pleasing image.
During the moments Staub’s boyfriend positions the camera to reveal them having sex, we see she’s adorned her vagina with two pieces of jewelry.
Mind you the amount of time we actually see them engaging in intercourse is fleeting, with a good portion of the tape providing us with a great view of Staub’s bedroom furnishings.
With her boyfriend frequently placing the camera on the bed away from the action, it brings to mind the movie The Blair Witch Project.
In keeping with the sub plot of her boyfriend’s athlete status, the couple take a half time water break to rehydrate, something that wasn’t needed considering not much sex was taking place.
After Staub’s boyfriend achieves climax, he takes the camera into the bathroom where we get to see her sitting on the toilet – riveting stuff indeed.
After a few minutes of mindless chatter and Staub taking a shower, the tape comes to an end.
Staub isn’t bad looking for a woman of 47 (45 when she made the tape) and aside from the terrible boob job, she’s kept her body in excellent shape.
But like every celebrity sex tape that promises so much, Danielle Staub Raw fails to deliver.
